My brother had a hamster....

I've said it before and I'll say it again: The best part about my job is the people I work with. The people you sit beside on a daily basis are the people that know exactly what you're going through at any moment in time, and understand without any explanation whatsoever, why you're banging your headset against the wall. I've given you a rundown of some of my favourite coworkers in the past, but today I'm going to let you get to know another one of my favourites. She's a loyal reader, coming in every day asking "Why haven't you updated your blog yet?" So lady, this one's all about you today.

The Voodoo Priestess

Recently, we had a conversation about religious beliefs, and she had told me that she believed in the Voodoo priestesses. Why? "Because that **** is real, girl". Ms. Voodoo is one of the funniest girls I happen to work with. She is one of my favourite people I like to listen in on when taking a call. There are times when I find her chatting with customers about the most asinine things, only to find out after the fact that yeah, it probably was an appropriate topic of conversation. Some examples of my favourites:

• A few years back, she had a caller complain that his cable kept cutting out. She thought the wires at the back might have been chewed by mice, or rats. Not wanting to offend the customer by implying he might have vermin in his home, she tells him a story.
  "So my brother had a hamster, and this little bugger liked to chew the cable wires behind the TV. It was awful, and we had to keep getting a new one. I don't know why my brother didn't just put him in one of those little ball things so he could run around. Check your cable cord and see if that happened to you"
  When she was done the call I asked her "Did your brother REALLY have a hamster?", to which she replied matter-of-factly "HELL NAWW"
  
• We had decided that we would go on break together. I was done my call and ready to hit the break button, but she was still on a call. Was she discussing the customer's bill? No. Was she explaining how to use the website? Nope, not that either. When she finally got off the call (10 minutes later), I asked her what took her so long. "I told my customer I wanted to buy my nephew rollerblades and she told me to buy him a video about rollerskating instead" Well...as long as we're all on topic and all.
  

The best part about Ms. Voodoo is how she'll tell you like it is. She has an opinion on everything and will tell everyone how she feels. While this trait can be seen as negative in many people, it's not the case for her. Everyone loves her. She definitely makes it easier to come into work every day and do my job. She always jokes with me about how when I finally make it as a big PR person, I'll have to hire her as my assistant. While it is a joke, in all honesty, if it ever came down to it I'd hire her in an instant. A hilarious girl and loyal until the end. She's also giving me ideas for blog posts, so you'll see some of those in the near future!

Sidenote: The article and interview with me in Information Age magazine is out! Check it out here !!

They might be weird, but they're my friends

The best part about my job is the range of personalities I get to work with on a daily basis. With so many different beliefs and values, it’s hard to imagine how we all manage to remain in one room together for 8-10 hours a day. My coworkers have managed to get me through the last five years and actually make it so I enjoy being there. In call centres, people come and go, but with my particular campaign we tend to have a lot of people stay for long periods of time (I call these people “lifers” – they hate me for it.) Last week I focused on the (lucky?) individuals who’d managed to break away from the call centre, but this week I’m going to talk about the characters I get to be around every day. These are the guys I sit with:

The Indian Guy

This guy is by far the funniest man at the call centre. His humour is sometimes strange, sometimes harsh, but always entertaining. He’s the guy that says what everyone’s thinking; it’s just ten times funnier because he has an accent to compliment it. When I told him I was doing this blog and would be talking about him, but that I wouldn’t mention his name, he said “No, no! Say my name, say my name! I’m a funny man”

The MMA fighter

This guy is the best, despite the fact that he bbms me regularly just to call me a slacker. I'll be honest, when I first met him I was a little intimidated. He's a strong looking guy and fights MMA on his spare time, so I was pretty much terrified of him. Once I got to know him, my perception completely changed. He is by far one of the nicest guys I've ever met. He also goes to see Twilight in the movie theatre with his girlfriend. (He'll kill me for mentioning that)

The Scapegoat

The butt of everyone's jokes, he's one of the most entertaining people to have around. This guy can NOT stop talking-ever. There have been many times we'll listen to him on his calls and he's trying to troubleshoot someone's internet connection (we take billing calls). We call him Patches because he can't grow a full beard, or manage to shave his face properly. He's a fellow Niagara College student and a genuinely nice guy. The Indian Guy insists that Patches call him "Father".

The Instigator

This guy is my best friend's brother and loves to cause trouble. He's the one that will poke the fire when something's about to erupt and then sit back and watch it all happen. His favourite pastime at work is setting up scenarios that will cause The Indian Guy to say or do something funny and then laugh at other people. What he doesn't know is just how aware of it we all are, and how everyone does it just to laugh at his genuine reaction. Out of all of us, he probably escalates his calls to supervisors the most, simply because he loves saying “no” to customers. Sometimes he’ll say things in the most patronising ways, but it’s hilarious to hear. He is a nice guy though, and always has level-headed advice for me when I need it.

The Hustler

This guy always has some business deal going on the side. He tries to sell pirated DVDs to people, he sells discounted roast chickens to The Indian Guy, and even told me he could get me a brand new BMW for five thousand dollars. His goal in life is to be rich, and evidently he’s willing to do anything it takes to get there. He has an awesome personality and is always dancing in the aisles when he’s not taking calls. Again, he’s a really nice guy.

As I've said before, these guys are the reason I love my job so much. In its own weird way, it's like a family. We might not always get along, but at the end of the day we know we'll be there for one another.