A Spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down....

One of the hardest parts about my job is giving customers bad news. When a request for a credit comes back denied or a channel disappears, you have to remember to remain tactful when dealing with these people. I have come to find that it’s not what you say that’s the problem; it’s how you say it. When I first started working at the call centre I was a complete pushover and would apply credits or give in to anyone who raised their voice to me. Sometimes you have to say no though, and there really isn’t anything else you can do. Over the years I’ve gotten a lot better at breaking news gently to people, but what’s going through my head and coming out of my mouth are two completely different things.

For example,

“You need to learn how to pay your bill on time” will translate to “We have an automatic withdrawal program that will automatically take out your payment on the due date, that way you know your payment has been made”

“You wouldn’t have had 6 months of overcharges on your bill if you’d bothered to look at it once in a while” translates into “I’m sorry that you were overcharged, that’s why we print itemized statements for you and give you 30 days to dispute them, in order to ensure you’re never billed for services you don’t have”

And my personal favourite

“Go ahead and switch to our competitor, they’re going to shut you off when you don’t pay them as well” translates into “I apologize for the inconvenience, however, it is common practice among all utilities to interrupt service for nonpayment”

People don’t like to hear bad news, but when said in a way that shows you really do care about their situation, it makes it easier to get the bad news across. This article outlines the key factors to keep in mind when delivering bad news to people.

I can't live without my TV!

Dealing with a major American cable company, we get many many customers calling in who are days away from having their cable disconnected because they can’t pay their bills. The fact of the matter is, they can’t afford to pay the bill and really shouldn’t have the service to begin with. The following scenario isn’t just one customer I’ve had to deal with, it’s an example of an issue I deal with multiple times a day.

Me: Again, Mrs. White, the last time you called us we told you that you needed to make a minimum payment of $xxx.xx in order to avoid service interruption. You didn’t do that.

Mrs. White: but I need to make the payment arrangement. I don’t want you to turn off my service, I need it.

Me: I’m really sorry, but you haven’t made any of the previous payment arrangements. We can’t give you another one. It also shows that the representative advised you to remove some services so your monthly rate isn’t so high. I notice that you didn’t do that. You’re paying for Showtime and HBO, which is costing you an extra $23 a month. Would you like to remove them?

Mrs. White: No, I need those channels. I can’t get rid of those.

Me: Sorry Mrs. White, your services will go off tomorrow and I can’t apply an extension.

Mrs. White: *begins to cry*WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITHOUT MY CABLE? (This is where I SHOULD have suggested she pick up a book, but again, I value my paycheck) I’m switching to(competitor)

Me: With all due respect Mrs. White, (competitor) will interrupt your service if you don’t pay your bills with them either.

In my 5 years at this call centre, I have learned one key thing. You can do absolutely anything to an American- steal from him, lie to him, even push his grandmother down the stairs- but do not shut off their cable. They cannot live without it. I found a really interesting article here about how cable should be one of the first things to go during a recession, but Americans as a whole just aren’t able to make the cut.

This video also goes into detail on how addicted to cable Americans seem to be. It’s quite sad, really.

If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read, but if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered well viewed.

Lily Tomlin

You mean he stole my scooter?

For the last few weeks I’ve given you a little look into my call centre and the people that I work with. While they’re important and definitely the reason I go in every day, most of my time is really spent talking to customers. Some of the calls I receive are extremely interesting. A call I received a few months ago has stuck with me to this day. Here’s Mr. Green’s story.

“Mr. Green”

Mr. Green spent an hour on the phone with me telling me he needed to pay his bill and insisted he would pay it the following Friday if I would just give him an extension. I applied the extension to his account, and yet he still felt the need to give me his life story. Normally, I’m really good at keeping the calls on track and getting the callers off the phone in an appropriate amount of time. This man however, piqued my interest. He told me how he just got out of jail for something he didn’t do. He told me that his lawyer told him that it was in his best interest to plead guilty and do the time. What was he accused of? Killing a cat. I told him to find a new lawyer. He agreed with me and went on to say that he bought a new scooter recently and that it was now missing. I couldn’t resist, I had to ask why. He went into a long story about how a man asked Mr. Green to drive a car down the street for him, while he rode the scooter to the store. He gave the man the scooter, (took his phone number for security reasons, of course) and agreed to meet him at an arranged time and location to pick up the scooter. I couldn’t help but interrupt at this point.

Me: “Did you actually believe him?”

Mr. Green: “Of course! He gave me his phone number and said I could have my scooter back when I called the number. I’ve been calling for four months but he won’t answer and I still don’t have my scooter!

Me: “Mr Green, that car was probably a stolen vehicle and you’ll most likely never see that scooter again. You shouldn’t be so trusting in strangers”

Mr. Green “He stole my scooter? No way darlin’, I thought I was doing a good thing”

He was actually surprised that I questioned his ability to make decisions. He’s clearly been so successful making them in the past. He went on for a half hour more talking about how some crazy women came into his home and ordered a ton of adult pay-per-views. This call was so entertaining and lasted so long I was hoping that my manager would hear this call as well, just so someone else could hear this insanity.

When a manager listens to a call, they give you a score out of 100. This is a Quality Assessment. Many call centres use this as a way to monitor their employees. Each client outlines what they want their representatives to do during a call, and then the call centres monitor the calls. You can read more about Quality Assessment in call centres here.

Again, there’s never a dull moment in the call centre. Some of these callers I will never forget, others I can’t get off my phone soon enough. Even though the call only lasts an average of 3 minutes, some people definitely make lasting impressions. So much so that 4 months later I’m still wondering what happened to that Mr. Green’s scooter.

They might be weird, but they're my friends

The best part about my job is the range of personalities I get to work with on a daily basis. With so many different beliefs and values, it’s hard to imagine how we all manage to remain in one room together for 8-10 hours a day. My coworkers have managed to get me through the last five years and actually make it so I enjoy being there. In call centres, people come and go, but with my particular campaign we tend to have a lot of people stay for long periods of time (I call these people “lifers” – they hate me for it.) Last week I focused on the (lucky?) individuals who’d managed to break away from the call centre, but this week I’m going to talk about the characters I get to be around every day. These are the guys I sit with:

The Indian Guy

This guy is by far the funniest man at the call centre. His humour is sometimes strange, sometimes harsh, but always entertaining. He’s the guy that says what everyone’s thinking; it’s just ten times funnier because he has an accent to compliment it. When I told him I was doing this blog and would be talking about him, but that I wouldn’t mention his name, he said “No, no! Say my name, say my name! I’m a funny man”

The MMA fighter

This guy is the best, despite the fact that he bbms me regularly just to call me a slacker. I'll be honest, when I first met him I was a little intimidated. He's a strong looking guy and fights MMA on his spare time, so I was pretty much terrified of him. Once I got to know him, my perception completely changed. He is by far one of the nicest guys I've ever met. He also goes to see Twilight in the movie theatre with his girlfriend. (He'll kill me for mentioning that)

The Scapegoat

The butt of everyone's jokes, he's one of the most entertaining people to have around. This guy can NOT stop talking-ever. There have been many times we'll listen to him on his calls and he's trying to troubleshoot someone's internet connection (we take billing calls). We call him Patches because he can't grow a full beard, or manage to shave his face properly. He's a fellow Niagara College student and a genuinely nice guy. The Indian Guy insists that Patches call him "Father".

The Instigator

This guy is my best friend's brother and loves to cause trouble. He's the one that will poke the fire when something's about to erupt and then sit back and watch it all happen. His favourite pastime at work is setting up scenarios that will cause The Indian Guy to say or do something funny and then laugh at other people. What he doesn't know is just how aware of it we all are, and how everyone does it just to laugh at his genuine reaction. Out of all of us, he probably escalates his calls to supervisors the most, simply because he loves saying “no” to customers. Sometimes he’ll say things in the most patronising ways, but it’s hilarious to hear. He is a nice guy though, and always has level-headed advice for me when I need it.

The Hustler

This guy always has some business deal going on the side. He tries to sell pirated DVDs to people, he sells discounted roast chickens to The Indian Guy, and even told me he could get me a brand new BMW for five thousand dollars. His goal in life is to be rich, and evidently he’s willing to do anything it takes to get there. He has an awesome personality and is always dancing in the aisles when he’s not taking calls. Again, he’s a really nice guy.

As I've said before, these guys are the reason I love my job so much. In its own weird way, it's like a family. We might not always get along, but at the end of the day we know we'll be there for one another.